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theauthenticselfcoach

Sometimes it’s as simple as making a different c

Sometimes it’s as simple as making a different choice. A conscious choice. Choosing love. Choosing to see the good things. Choosing to see people’s intentions not their opinions. Sometimes it’s realising how much you love and letting that be your guide.

With love,
Corinne

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#choose #choice #love #perspective #goodthings #quoteoftheday #thoughtoftheday #writer #writersofinstagram #coach

We can tell ourselves a story our whole lives and

We can tell ourselves a story our whole lives and it’s not that it’s untrue, but sometimes it’s only one part of a much larger picture.

I wrote a post about the “fathers” in my life. How I felt saddened that I never really had one even though I had many male presences in my life—they weren’t really the true father I had hoped for.

But since writing, I began to think, but what of my mother’s role in this?

I had made a whole story about men which I’ve had to sift through and rewrite throughout my life with every layer of healing I’ve done.

But what do I need to heal in relation to my mother? In relation to women? What did I learn about women and relationship through her?

They are confronting questions but equally liberating because the more pieces of the puzzle I put together, the clearer the image becomes, the easier it becomes to liberate myself from the story and see things through a whole and healed heart, and clear eyes that reflect that heart.

I don’t get stuck in blame. We’re all human. We cope until we become aware of what needs our own loving attention. Until we heal from the inside out.

I’m realising I had a one sided story. Not all men leave. Women leave too. Not all men betray. Women betray too.

When we get stuck on one side we deprive ourselves of truly healing. And often when we believe only one side, we do end up attracting a situation that affirms our beliefs & fears. Until we do the work & then a new kind of man or woman gets to step in. One that shows us that the past is the past & the story was just that: a story.

They perhaps unknowingly invite us to put our fears, our armour, our daggers at the ready, down, once and for all.

They show us that there are good men and women. That we can trust & feel safe. That we are loved.

But we’ll only truly notice it all, when we can hold & heal ourselves. Then, we’ll be ready to receive. To be embraced & to embrace, equally. Then, we’ll know what love is because we will have planted the seed within us vs trying to grow roots outside of soil. Then, we’ll be able to grow side by side, two trees of the same forest.

With love,
Corinne

#story #healing #men #women #relationship

See my story to listen in We all have a story. We

See my story to listen in

We all have a story. We all have experienced a version of suffering, pain, trauma yet we don’t often talk about it because we’ve been taught that all those “negative” things are something to be ashamed of. And too, it’s vulnerable.

We live in a culture that has conditioned us to believe that all hard emotions are negative and that pain or trauma is something to be ashamed of. We’ve been taught to always be happy and positive and successful. But are we really happy? Are we really free?

It’s my belief and experience that when we learn to own our experiences with love and full acceptance, naming the shame and actually coming towards ourselves rather than trying to “get rid” of parts of ourselves, pretending they don’t exist (which only deepens our shame), we feel fully liberated. Because when we own our entire experience and humanity within ourselves, we feel relief, empowerment, wholeness and safety. And when we feel safe within ourselves, sharing our vulnerability—or just our humanity, to be honest—becomes an empowering act. It becomes liberating.

I share a bit of my story today just to open the door for you to perhaps know that there is no shame in your story either. That all things can be healed and transformed if we hold them with love.

There’s nothing wrong with you. There never was. Life happens and sometimes it hurts. However, it offers us the opportunity to discover who we truly are beneath the many layers of who we think we should be.

May this be an invitation for you to begin the conversation with yourself, someone you love and trust.
#podcast #shame #vulnerability
*I want to add that in doing the healing work, I’m not insinuating that we need to relive our trauma. I’m saying instead that the act of holding our wounded parts with love, without getting into the story of it, is what I’ve found to be the fastest route to healing. It’s about giving ourselves loving attention. It’s about holding ourselves instead of rejecting or abandoning these parts of ourselves that maybe we don’t like. It’s about walking towards rather than away. The simple act of showing up for ourselves with love vs judgment, is life changing.

At some point we’ll need to recognise that freed

At some point we’ll need to recognise that freedom holds more value than safety. Most especially when the safety we believe we’re seeking, is not in fact safety at all, but an illusion of safety, instead.

Much like how we tend to a broken heart, shutting ourselves down, building walls and isolating ourselves from love does not keep us safe. It creates the illusion that we’re protected but actually we’re just alone, depriving ourselves of what we all innately need: love.

Safety comes when we reside fully in an open heart that tends to itself with consistency so that we trust our own presence and care. We trust that we’ll always show up for ourselves and never leave ourselves behind. Self-abandoning, looking for the outer to fill the void and make us feel safe again. Stay by your own side and you will know true safety.

Safety comes when we’re expanded, big, in our fullest being. Not when we’re contracted, small, in a hole so tiny we think no one can reach us. But foxes know how to burrow their muzzles in holes.

We live in a society that has burdened us for decades, if not centuries, with fear. If we’re buried in fear, if it has been absorbed into our cells, triggering a perpetual state of survival, we will seek safety.

But control is not safety.

I see it in relationships all the time. People controlling the other because they’re afraid. Afraid of being abandoned. Rejected. Left alone, unloved. Control always comes out of fear not love.

When really what we’re seeking is Freedom. Relief. Expansion. Wholeness. Connection. Love. And that can only truly come when we let go of control and fall into trust. And trust can only come if we stop believing that we’re going to die at every corner. That our fears are going to eat us alive. It only comes when we show up for ourselves and embrace our fears with love rather than constantly seeking armour to protect our tender wounds.

Our world is building walls. It’s lining up tanks and putting us at war not only with one another but with ourselves.

Cont⬇️ #safety #freedom #control #illusion #awakening #growth #authentic #wings #change #fear #love #one

The Discomfort Is The Way. Discomfort is the way b

The Discomfort Is The Way. Discomfort is the way back home to heart and our innate nature. It is not something to be ignored, nor is it something to get stuck within, but to be used as a catalyst instead, to come back home to ourselves.

So when sadness arises, confusion, pain, suffering, anger, despair....let that be the invitation to come back to love, to who you truly are, to a place that can hold this all and grow further and evolve vaster through and out of it.

With love,
Corinne

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#discomfort #suffering #pain #confusion #thesetimes #world #love #heart #home #humanity #awakening #ascension #2021 #coach #lifecoaching #authentic #compassion #growth #evolution

How To Change The World. Our relationship towards

How To Change The World. Our relationship towards ourselves affects our identity which affects the way Wes how up in the world and how we interact and relate to authority.

If we’re coming from a place of self worth because we’re embracing our entire human experience, vs judging aspects of ourselves as bad or wrong, we no longer need to look to an external authority figure to validate who we are.

And if we’re no longer looking for that external validation, then we can step into a system of the circle which is held with equal respect and empowerment. We recognise that the hierarchical system no longer works because from a universal level it’s simply not right.

All change begins within. We can change the world. It is within our power. But it requires us to come back home to ourselves with love and presence. To get quiet on the inside so we can show up for ourselves. If we show up for ourselves, we’ll show up differently for one another. And this is how we begin to create change because the external systems will have to adjust to a new way that reflects the very relationship we have to ourselves.

It starts within...

With love,
Corinne
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#change #world #emotions #acceptance #humanity #identity #authority #goodenough #selfworth #judgment #coach #lifecoach #theauthenticself #authentic

My next episode from my off the cuff podcast: Raw

My next episode from my off the cuff podcast: Raw Conversations

See my story to listen in via Spotify, Anchor or on Telegram: https://t.me/rawconversations

I think we all have an idea of what our life “should” be like. We get asked the question, “What will you do when you grow up?” when we’re, like, 4 years old. And so we learn to measure ourselves by what we do and we feel like failures if what we “do,” isn’t hugely successful.

Somewhere along the way we create this expectation that we need to have it all figured out by the time we’re 25 and that the path there should be linear and easy.

And then Life happens...The only thing is, nobody prepared us for what life is REALLY like.

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#podcast #rawconversations #corinneblum #coach #theauthenticself #life #lifeplans #experience #story #wisdom #lifelessons

I’ve often said that neediness is just an expres

I’ve often said that neediness is just an expression of our unmet needs.

First we need to understand how to tend to those needs within ourselves, but there is nothing wrong with the desire to have our needs met by our partner. It has to be a request, of course, vs a demand, and that requires vulnerability.

But I believe this notion that we shouldn’t need anything from our partner, is a falsehood. It’s also a falsehood to give our partner what they need and think it will make them more needy because we’re tending to their every whim. Everything requires maturity and awareness but a need met, is a need that can let go and move on.

We are wired for connection and as this book (Attached) speaks to, dependency isn’t a bad word but in fact a survival trait.

I would go into this further to say interdependency is perhaps the greatest balance I’ve found BUT, all connections require:

Self-awareness
Self-responsibility
The willingness to look at, hold and heal our own wounds
The ability to be able to show up vulnerably
The knowledge to communicate maturely and compassionately from an authentic place within ourselves that is aware of our needs, triggers, fears,
insecurities and desires
The willingness to actively listen to our partner

In short:
The awareness to hold our tender humanity and the little one that resides within us.

We need to relearn what attachment means. Babies require attachment in order to survive physically and most especially emotionally. Closeness is essential.

We sadly live in a culture that for the most part forces independence, self-sufficiency and self-reliance far too early — often at the expense of our very real needs that undoubtedly go unmet. And often paying the price of fear of intimacy in one shape, form or another.

This is just the tip of the iceberg...

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#attached #dependency #love #relationship #couples #needs #vulnerability #coach #lifecoach #relationshipcoach #book

I’ve always found a kind of romance in the sunse

I’ve always found a kind of romance in the sunset. I don’t mean the traditional romance of a sunset, sat beside the one you love (though that’s certainly nice too!).

I mean the kind of romance found inside yourself when life, a moment, takes on a kind of poetry.

Time stands still.
There is feeling.
Depth.
Silence.
Profundity.

It’s always been my peace.
My happy place.
A kind of communion with myself.

It reminds me to come back home.
To take time.
Take care of myself.
Fall back into love with myself.
Tend to my heart and my being.

And in the end, there is always gratitude.

For beauty.
For love.
For magic.

- Corinne Blum

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#sunset #peace #happy #happiness #love #romance #selfcare #home #beauty #magic #nature #writer #writersofinstagram #poetry #poems #poetsofinstagram

So I started a new off the cuff podcast called Raw

So I started a new off the cuff podcast called Raw Conversations. It’s a spontaneous, unscripted, flow of thoughts kind of conversation between myself and the listener (eventually with guests!) about what it’s like to be human behind the masks, facades and filters we often wear or hide behind in life.

We dive below who we think we “should” be, and into who we truly are as our Authentic Self. Embracing our entire humanity and learning along the way that it’s ok to be who we are. Nothing to fix. Nothing to get rid of. Just our humanity looking to be held, loved and accepted for what and who it is.

Life is just a series of experiences. Can we hold it without judgment and embrace it instead, with love. For love, is the true alchemist.

Follow me on these platforms (hopefully more to come soon!):

Listen on Spotify: https://sptfy.com/rawconversations
Listen on Anchor: https://anchor.fm/rawconversations_corinneblum
Listen on Telegram: https://t.me/rawconversations

I’m working it out as I go along. For now it’s unpolished but I hope genuine, accessible and relaxing to listen to.

Please feel free to get in touch with topics you want me to talk about.

Thanks for your support!

With love,
Corinne

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#podcast #rawconversations #corinneblum #spotify #anchor #telegram #authenticity #relationship #selfgrowth #selfdevelopment #coach #lifecoach #lifecoaching #relationshipcoach #relationshipcoaching #couples #couplescoaching

Episode 3 from my podcast: Raw Conversations See

Episode 3 from my podcast: Raw Conversations

See my story to listen on Spotify.

What I see most working with both couples and individuals, is that we take things personal. We get triggered. We react. We argue. We get hurt. And then we repeat and repeat again.

Today I talk about what it looks like to not take things personal and the positive affects that arise when we tend to our own stuff first, so that we can meet each other at the table and show up from our vulnerable, authentic selves.

When we don’t take things personal, and when we can drop into a more transparent, vulnerable state of being and get to the real stuff beneath the surface, we are able to build a bridge between each other and create connection and deeply fulfilling love.

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#podcast #relationship #personal #donttakeitpersonal #coach #relationshipcoach #authenticity #vulnerability #selfgrowth #selfdevelopment

I am the most patient and impatient person. I kn

I am the most patient and impatient person.

I know, I’m a walking contradiction.

My mind is quick and my vision clear and I often find a part of me is five steps ahead of me, impatiently waiting for my body to catch up.

Every time life moves too slow for me—and by slow I don’t mean I’m a busy body that needs something to do every second of the day. I mean my vision of the future is so visceral that a part of me is already living there and I need to remember to be patient enough for the physical to catch up with the ethereal. So every time life seems to move too slow and I get frustrated, I’m reminded that this is an opportunity for me to learn the grace of patience. And let me tell you, sometimes I’m clumsy in it.

So worry kicks in.
Insecurity burrows in.
I feel I’m standing on loose gravel vs solid ground but the kicker is: I’m creating the instability.

My want for “all at once” to occur, is the very thing that gets in the way and prolongs the very future I’m walking towards. I know it’s there. I feel it. I know it. It’s coming. And yet I keep jumping in along the path.

My impatience is the hurdle. My frustration is the mound that trips me over. My anger is the mountain I find myself climbing up, in worn out flip flops.

So I tell myself, “Get out of the way, Corinne. You know this is a tango with life and life takes the lead while you learn how to elegantly close your eyes and navigate it from that still point inside of you that you know is the creation of all things. Get quiet. Get still. Listen. Let go. Dance.”

And then I begin again.
Another breath.
Another new moment.
This one just that little bit more trusting. Relaxed. Relieved.

With love,
Corinne

#patience #letgo #getouttheway #surrender #trust #life #wisdom #writer #writersofinstagram #coach

Episode 2 from my off the cuff podcast: Raw Conver

Episode 2 from my off the cuff podcast: Raw Conversations
Found on Spotify and Anchor

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#podcast #embracing #fear #coach #lifecoach #relationship #relationshipcoach #emotions #being #human

New rough cut podcast: Raw Conversations with Cori

New rough cut podcast: Raw Conversations with Corinne Blum.

You can find me on Spotify and other podcast platforms.

Stay tuned for more. As I build it up, if you want to ask me a question you’d like me to answer, or if you’d like to share a topic you want me to speak on, please leave a comment below.

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#podcast #rawconversations #spotify #coach #lifecoach #relationship

The last few weeks have been like a kind of inner

The last few weeks have been like a kind of inner excavation. Just as soon as you think you’ve done the work (over decades, no less) another layer comes to the surface to be purged.

God, sometimes being human is so painful. But always through the fire of pain, comes the greatest bliss. But I say, “through the fire,” because it’s just that. There’s no circumventing. If you want the bliss you need to dive full bodied into the pain, first.

I’m grateful for what I’ve learned along the way. To stay long enough with myself to not self abandon. To sit within the discomfort long enough to see and feel it transform rather than stuffing it further down only for it to fester deeper. Only for the little girl to become more scared and more lonely each and every time.

I’m grateful that age makes you wiser if you’re willing to embrace your humanity and love your tenderness and allow it all to be okay because in truth, it is.

Life sometimes is brutal. But it’s also exquisitely beautiful.

It just asks us to stay. To find courage in our softness and let it keep opening us and opening us ever so gently. Ever so consistently.

Always learning. Always growing. Perhaps more, ever remembering who I really am.

With love,
Corinne

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#stay #courage #life #pain #bliss #growth #evolution #selfdevelopment #selflove #love #being #human #wisdom #age #writer #writersofinstagram #coach #lifecoach #spiritualcoach

And then angels enter and remind you of the beauty

And then angels enter and remind you of the beauty of who you are.

They wrap you in their love and give you what you’ve always needed: a warm and loving embrace.

And in that, you find your own arms again, holding the little girl that was so scared, so confused, that only needed a hug to make her feel safe, to put solid earth beneath her feet and remind her that she has wings and does not fly alone.

Sometimes we need reminders.
Sometimes we just need a hug.
Sometimes we need to look at ourselves in the mirror and simply say:

I love you so much.

With love,
Corinne

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#angels #love #selflove #support #healing #whitefeather #embrace #hug #poetry #poems #poet #poetsofinstagram #writer #writersofinstagram #lifecoach #lifecoaching

Sometimes all we’re asked to do is stay. Stay wi

Sometimes all we’re asked to do is stay. Stay with the feeling. The discomfort. The fragility. The vulnerability. The humanness of it all.

Nothing to fix or change. Just stay.

Stay long enough to let the light pierce through the cracks and remind you again of what you’re made of.

You’re not the cracks, you’re the light that shines through them.

With love,
Corinne

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#light #cracks #stay #feelings #discomfort #being #human #life #wisdom #thoughts #writer #writersofinstagram #coach #rememberwhoyouare

LOVE IS A CHOICE. Some thoughts from a sleepy-face

LOVE IS A CHOICE. Some thoughts from a sleepy-faced, sweatpant monster on the couch on a rainy day...

Showing up with love is a choice and that’s why it’s sometimes hard to show up with love. Because sometimes it feels easier to react, to defend, judge, blame, remain in conflict etc.

It’s easier but it’s more tiring. It’s less fulfilling. And in a way, it’s also hypocritical because it seems that we’re ok with getting mad at others because somehow it’s justifiable when it’s coming from us, but it’s not ok the other way around.

Choosing to show up with love takes vulnerability. Humility. We have to ask ourselves if we’re willing to not be defensive. To choose to be vulnerable and honest and present with our truth as we move through each moment.

Now more than ever we are being beckoned to show up with heart. Not just with mind, most especially if it’s not connected to our heart. The mind is the servant not the master.

So how can we make the choice to respond vs react? To choose love and not fear? To take care of ourselves so that we are not motivated by fear, therefore feeling the survival based instinct to control everything happening within and around us. To embrace our fear instead and take care. To act with care. Respond with care. Live with care.

I believe that now more than ever, we have to learn to live from our heart. To be more caring. More humble. This to me is a path to a much brighter future. One that does not require fear as the conductor of the train. One where life can be enjoyed for the journey that it is vs stopping at every station where each stop represents yet another threat.

Which path will you choose?
What future do you want to create?

Some thoughts...as always, take it or leave it as feels right for you.

With love,
Corinne

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#love #choice #fear #mind #heart #care #relationship #control #relationshipcoach #lifecoach #lifecoaching

I would say 99.9% (I won’t say 100% just to not

I would say 99.9% (I won’t say 100% just to not speak in absolutes) of the people I’ve worked with, at the core, have the belief that they are not good enough. And it’s no surprise.

Why?

Because a culture, a society, an educational system, even a, hopefully dying, paradigm of parenting, that leads with shame, can only produce the belief that who we are is not good enough.

The good thing is it’s just a story, a limiting belief, a bad habit, therefore we can change it.

It requires us, however, to get out of victimisation. It requires that we stop looking for someone outside of ourselves to save us. Or tell us what to do. Or make our lives for us.

It requires us to take self-responsibility. To empower ourselves. To choose to show up for ourselves and be our own saviour.

It takes letting go of the story. Blaming someone or something else. Giving our power to someone or something else outside of ourselves.

It takes courage.
It takes patience.
It takes an immense amount of compassion and love.

It takes, taking a leap of faith that maybe just maybe, nothing is actually wrong with you.

It takes maybe having the blind faith that you are good enough and worthy of love, respect and dare I say, good things happening to you.

It takes valuing yourself and knowing that you matter. You’re not just a number. You’re not an assembly line worker or a worker bee, you are uniquely you and you belong here because you were born into this planet.

But what all these take, is self-acceptance.

No matter how you feel, what you think, what you’re experiencing, it’s ok. There’s nothing wrong with you. You’re not doing it wrong. There is no right way to living life there’s only you being authentically you and humanely you and that means that you’re going to be messy. You’ll have pain. You won’t always know. You’ll f*** up. You’ll get sad and angry and you know what? It’s all OK.

If we all saw, felt and embodied our self- worth, we would live in a very different world.

The more you love and accept yourself, the more power you will have to make this world a better place.

Does it take effort? Sure.
Is it worth it? Absolutely.

- Corinne Blum
#selfworth

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