Posted on January 11, 2016
In many ways I feel children have a greater emotional intelligence than adults – in the sense that they fully allow themselves to feel what arises for them emotionally, without judgment or censorship. They wear their hearts on their sleeves, they feel strongly and then let it go, returning to their very natural state of joy, love and innocence.
As adults, we are so quick to judge or shame what we are feeling. We stuff feelings down that seem “wrong” to have, forcing them to fester and toil in their attempt to be seen and felt. We easily get stuck in our story all because we think that what we are feeling is not ok. We do, as adults, have the ability to not allow our emotions to lash out but truly, if we were to meet our experience with the warmth of a big embrace, with an open heart and an empathic ear, there would be no need to lash out, for whatever we felt in that moment would be held with acceptance. For me personally, the moment I let go of the shame, the judgement of being sad/depressed/frustrated/angry….I found I was able to simply allow my experience to move through me, to come up and out just as I see my daughter does so purely, so quickly, so effortlessly. I learn this from her everyday: to be honest with my feelings, to take responsibility for them, to feel them, name them and let them pass. Sometimes it’s easy, sometimes it’s extraordinarily hard, but all the time I’m learning to find more kindness towards myself – and her – in this complex experience of being human.